Early Returned Honor

Doctrine and Covenants 124:49


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Thoughts From the Early Returned Missionary Fireside

I had the opportunity to go to a fireside for early returned missionaries done by The Early Returned Missionary Initiative. Thank you to everyone who is involved with this wonderful program! It was great to meet you! Because there are people who aren’t able to go to firesides like this, I wanted to mention a few of the things they talked about. Continue reading

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Dear Early Returned Missionary: What I Wish I Had Known When I Came Home From My Mission

Dear friend,

I wish we could have this conversation face-to-face. This post is the reason why this website was started. There were things that I wish I had known when I came home. I wish I had known someone who could sit me down and tell me things that would have helped to spare me from the agony that I felt for so long. I can’t physically sit down and talk to all of you, although I would if it was possible. So, instead, I’m writing this letter. Even if it’s not the same as a personal conversation, I hope it can help you as you adjust to coming home. I have thought and prayed about this message for a long time. I hope that the thoughts here will be helpful to early returned missionaries, but I also hope that some of them will be useful to those who had the blessing of being able to complete their time in the mission field. Continue reading


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Light and Darkness

A year ago yesterday, I hit absolute rock bottom when I felt that I could not go on any more. A year ago today, light came rushing back into my life.

My Experience

As you may know from reading my story or some of the other posts, I went through a long period of darkness after I came home from my mission. I got to the point where I hit rock bottom. I saw no possibility of hope. I was completely broken. Continue reading


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Bailing Out the Boat

Another personal blog post.

The MTC wasn’t the happiest experience of my life. I got sick enough with the flu that they almost took me to the emergency room and I was quarantined in the dorm room for about a week. My companion and I (had a little bit of trouble adjusting to being constant companions 24/7. I was overwhelmed at the idea of even being a missionary and needing to talk to people. And it was exhausting. Somehow in all of the talk about missions I had ever heard, I didn’t remember anyone telling me how exhausting and difficult the MTC would be. Most of the time I felt like I needed to have windshield wipers installed on my eyeballs because I was either crying for frustration with myself for not being able to teach, frustration at being sick, or frustration that comes from exhaustion or crying because I was experiencing some of the most beautiful spiritual moments I had had up until that point of my life. The whole experience was a whirlwind. Some of it I don’t remember. Some moments I can picture as clear as if they happened five minutes ago. Continue reading